What seems to be the problem?

One of the joys of being a grandparent is watching the grandchildren grow and develop, seeing their parents in them and how they develop their various character traits. My son and grandson were here a few weeks ago to help fix a plumbing challenge. It’s my son who has some plumbing training, but both were taking the job equally seriously, the 3-year-old with his set of tools, his head torch on, crouching down and saying, ‘What seems to be the problem?’. It made us smile but what we were seeing was a model in teaching by example.

Leading by example has been on my mind this week. The way we can model behaviour – for good or ill. There are leaders who are good models and leaders who are the opposite. Like most of us I’ve experienced both and have tried, when asked to lead, to be the former. This is important because the behaviour of leaders does trickle down, set the tone, convey values which permeate any group.

These musings were prompted by a discussion on a familiar Bible passage, the story of Jesus being baptised by John the Baptist. John felt it should be the other way round as he, John, was less important but Jesus insisted. Much has been said about this incident but at its heart there is a simple, and not especially religious, message – you lead by example. Significantly, this message is not itself stated but modelled.

This places a responsibility on all of us because we are all leaders in some sense, whether or not we have a recognised leadership position. We all influence others. Our kindnesses, our helpfulness, friendliness provoke the same in others – and the same is true of our faults. We can resist following the model of course, and the more people who resist following the example of some world leaders the better, but it takes an effort of will, something conscious, intended. Learning by osmosis and following is more inbuilt, natural. All the more important then, to be positive models ourselves.

For me this was a timely discussion. A helpful reminder that in a troubled world, we can each make a difference.

Role models

I knew a lad called Ben
or Ivan
though neither was his name

Ben was his father
not a big man
but larger than life 

Ivan rode speedway
the best they said
the fastest

Ben delivered letters
knew everyone
always had a greeting

young Ben learnt young
hailed you from a distance
a voice that carried

Ivan beat them all
world champion
the one to watch

emulated by young Ben 
find someone faster,
follow them, he said

telling his friends so often
they started to call him
young Ivan

the strange thing is
that growing up
I knew him well

but his real name?
Can’t remember
Couldn’t tell.